Roadside Distractions

The zombie grrls have decided that my wife and I simply must join them on a tour of roadside America. And it's gonna be tax deductible since the locations are going in to the book (What's the accountant's motto? It's tax avoidance, not tax evasion). Thank God for research expenses.

Here's the wacky itinerary…

1. The Berkley Hole in Butte Montana, deepest man-made hole (stripped out copper mine) lorded over by America's largest statue of the Madonna. My question: Did they dig too deep? Was something loosed?

2. The Jewel Cave in South Dakota. Deep and strenuous, by the sound of the travel guide. Hmmm.

3. Mount Rushmore: for those North by Northwest homage sequences. Considered staying at the Alex Johnson in Rapid City where Hitchcock shot scenes.

4. Devil's Tower, Wyoming. But only from a distance, We're not driving two hours off the freeway to see a big rock, no matter what the dead have to say about it. I've seen Wolf Creek, I know how that trip ends.

5. Yellowstone: it'll look something like this photo.
Fun times at Yellowstone

6. Jackson Hole: The zombies are elitists and prefer expensive five star accommodations, plus they'll be hungry for well fed meat. Who am I to judge?

We'll hit other freak shows, along the way. I'm particularly interested in locations to set my hidden supernatural attractions, like the world's largest spool of human intestines, and Count Steve's Castle of Spleens.

(Cross posted from Zombie Chow)