Book Reviews: Bloodsucking Fiends and You Suck: A Love Story by Christopher Moore


I just finished Christopher Moore’s You Suck: A Love Story—figured I better before I get it signed—and came away laughing, one, and wondering what Janet Maslin looked like reading the line “pale as albino monkey cum.” Both You Suck: A Love Story and Bloodsucking Fiends follow the adventures of undying sarcastic lovers Jody and Tommy, the Safeway graveyard shift vampire slayers (a.k.a., the Animals), and the Emperor of San Francisco. Fiends begins the tale, focusing on Jody's experience of becoming a bloodsucker and enlisting Tommy as her assistant slash sex slave. The two are harassed by Jody's sire, who leaves a trail of dead bodies right up to Jody's door. Moore does some interesting things with vampire lore, while throwing out pop culture references like a commentator on Best Week Ever.

While both novels are hilarious, there’s just that something extra special about You Suck: A Love Story. Her name is Abby Normal, because she’s tossed aside her corporate slave name, to follow the night, like the punky goth shit she is. Sixteen years old and shameless in her journal: Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal, and variously subtitled. Abby becomes the minion of Tommy (The Vampyre Flood) and Jody (The Countess), her assistant, the tragically gay and pale Jared, tags along as her whipping boy.

I don’t want to give much away, and I highly recommend reading the books in order just to show that 630 pages can be a whole lot of fun, but there is a Blue Man Group hooker subplot, that’ll just kill ya.

Looking forward to meeting Chris Moore tonight up at UW, but not to reading more vampire lore. Hello, burnout.

Next book: Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maguire

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